House-sitting in Italy

In hindsight I think what I wanted all along was to be with cats and dogs. So when Jacqueline, who wanted to reassure our home-sit, informed us: ‘Our Keesje Jack Russell got unexpectedly 7 puppies, would you still want to come?’, my ‘yes’ could not have been bigger! To be in someone else’s house is not immediately a wish of mine, but for these dogs and cats and to be away from the known that has become predictable.

Subsequent, we find out whether Italy is worth moving to. Seen from a home to live in, we think we can judge our quest better.

Well, we are a bit wrong because now we are living in homes that we wouldn’t choose and with not more to do than caring for a dog, even if the number reaches 10, we are not really living there. At some point the wintery circumstances and comfort are well below our own Hungarian place. But most important for my travelers heart, I need a different scenery. In late summer this works wonders.

Is there a home better than your own? No, there isn’t. House sitting, understandably, often happens in the guest room. Now we move between areas where is no spoon in the kitchen to one where are no sharp knives to another where the owner is clearly a cook with the utensils you need, apart for the tiny kitchen. A guestroom is funnily different than one’s own home (our own Hungarian guestroom no exception).

We start off as novices with no demands and end up as people who’ve been around the block. Our initial concern is the care for someone else’s pet. I desperately want to become friends with all the animals (it turns out it this is very easy with dogs). There is the matter of your own liking. Could you cuddle with the dog? Is walking a dog really nice? Or, is the dog not too strong for my petite frame?

The Bracciano home, with rescued dog Chakra

We drive from Sicily back to our first house-sit experience. Back to Chakra, who is a very traumatized dog that is scared by sudden sounds and distrust unusual actions, even in the home she lives. Chakra was abandoned by a neighbor who suffered himself traumatic losses. Valerie took two years out to form Chakra from a neglected, barking stray dog into a quiet and trustful pet. Chakra’s snout became one of the images stuck in my mind; I am truly happy to see her again.

It is astonishing to see how eager this little black dog is to walk on a leash, in a neighbourhood she formerly strayed to find food. It is a pure pleasure to care for her. Her fine tuned expressions and sparing attention feels very valuable when she gives it.

When we leave Valerie and Jeff it feels our acquaintanceship has become a little more friendship. As if we share that one common binder: a dog. Valerie is a distinguished, classy woman, one I never would have met outside house-sitting assignments, simply because we move in different modes of living. Our connection is Chakra. We get the alarm-system key-attachments to their home to return to when our third sit will call for. With Parisian cheese and cardamom cookies we hug each other goodbye.

Another 3 days of van-life with camping on the side presents itself. Now, circumstances are undesired. Waking up in a tent soaked from the high humidity level and setting it up while it’s wetness has turned into foam, combined with a smell of mold, is not pleasant. Often I step between used condoms and wet toilet paper. Yet, I still do not long to go back to Hungary and the visits to the cafes and it’s pastries keeps being interesting. These few slow days on the road we have two house viewings in Umbria. The landscape is marvelous but the viewings are not.

We slept at our first house viewing. The advertisement looked better and the traffic passing could only be figured out while being there. Having had a closer look we cancelled the inside viewing: we’d seen enough.

Italy has a good selection if it comes to food, but spices are few and high priced. All vegetables must be packed in plastic and most comes standard in wrappings or on a Styrofoam tray. Without our Hungarian compost heaps nor burning pit, trash becomes incredible much. I am displeased by the amount of plastic and packaging I use up. I miss my outhouse toilet where the movements of my bowel find its way to that same pile of organic recyclables. Now, all is literally wasted, my circle of recycling disturbed. Things like tea need to be bought and our fresh eggs, milk and meat is no more. But Geo and I had a strong ‘Let’s see what happens,’ when we left our partly self-sustainable plot in September.

Being in Italy is one, imagining living is a whole other: restrictions make us realize how much more free Hungary is. Being in winter in Italy is a total different feel than in summer. The old towns consist of damp rocks that form massive walls. Large slabs of natural stone is overgrown with moss. Shiny cobblestones from rain shimmer through the mist. Cold historic alleyways where a cafe offers refuge but also sounds that I rather escape.

In our inexperience with house-sitting we applied for what we thought good places and stuffed the months of November till January full with sits. Umbria and Marche turn out to be cold. I wear my down-jacket all the time and come to conclusion Italy is not ‘better’ in winter than Hungary. Yet my second long home-sit is just splendid (I feel as at home).

The Umbria home: 1 Maremmano dog, 2 cats, 2 chickens

A Dutch couple living in a restored rustic farmhouse with a size impossible to heat up. Steps and elevations make up the living quarters and our little apartment is of a simplicity I immediately appreciate. There is a sauna adjacent to a fresh water pool (this will be our Wim Hof cold bath), overlooking villages on top of hills.

When I meet with the Dutch home owners I realize how there is an invisible and automatic similarity and recognition, from my side at least. There seem to be an obsolete need to explain. Expressions are similar to mine and a sudden Dutch characteristics within me takes over as a natural intervention. It feels warm and intimate, meeting these particular fellow countrymen. The kitchen we sit in must be a typical Italian one, dark and hard to warm up. I like this couple immediately, their woolen pullovers, surely hand-knitted, feel good. They are from the same town as I am and they are familiar with the same people we know (they from television and we from reality). They adhere to specifics we go by and even order two of my handmade pouches (thank you Maryse) before we buy some liters of olive oil from their plot.

Maryse and Eduard offer their beautiful guestroom as a holiday stay. More information on Il Bandito Arancione.

Walking the area by myself, a little dog tags along. It turns out Koos’ friend Gioiella. Koos is only interested in her when outside and only for the first few minutes. Their playing game seems unfair but my study shows they each have their own strength and indeed, are an equal team. Except when inside: my incompetence shows I have to learn a thing or two in dog behavior. Most wondrous is that we are afraid of these sheep dogs when hiking, yet it doesn’t have to. Or is that because we are now part of his flock?

Caring for the chicken is a job I like, and these particular chicken were remarkable: they followed me when ever I was outside, wanting to come indoors and letting them pet their feathers.

I need to use my creativity to keep warm, without wanting to raise the energy costs, and with a hot-water bottle and pellet stove I manage. However, the cats on my lap are heating my heart to the maximum. At the same time I am in wonderment how a dog this size, able to rip me apart, is not doing just that. It dawns on me being a dog-sitters might cause unexpected harm, to anyone at any given time. Besides the explanation the dog owners talk you through, I think it makes sense to know what the breed specific behavior is. What we both like about house-sitting is meeting the owners and talking at length about their animals.

The ultimate friendship is when a cat wants to be on you. Even though I suspect it is about motives other than friendship, that is not at all important to a cat lover.

I notice how I like to be somewhere else, and with an end in sight, I enjoy even the misty cold days. I embrace myself as much as I can with the animals and grab all the attention that I can get, to fill up the sudden disappearance of our own cats. That what our neighbor in Hungary disliked sinks in much deeper while away from it: he took the life of our 6 cats. Now, I love the animals without attaching myself to them. It works. This home is not mine, neither are the animals and I feel not stuck but rather the opposite. It is actually a relief to be able to love home and pets without having the responsibility that lasts.

The Marche home: 2 Jack Russells who unexpectedly produced 7 puppies, 5 on the premises when we come, 1 mixed breed, 1 Maremmano, 1 Romanian Raven shepherd puppy, 2 cats, 4 chickens.

The next home does not conjure up such emotions. The apartment we are housed in is one I want to escape, especially into the nature we are surrounded by. ‘The downstairs floor that is partly surrounded by earth is always 18ºC degrees’, it said in the description. That probably is true for the summer, in winter not. Luckily, I am hardened, but really, comfort is in sunshine.

However, the interior is more of a challenge: all the decorative stuff that is discarded, left-over and collected over a lifetime of travelling is housed on the floor for the guests. Geo and I find it hard to function in a visually noisy environment. But we are also encouraged to stay in their warmer living quarters and be in the dogs company. My jumpy self wants it all: the puppies inside and the puppy outside. The cuteness level is too much!

Jacqueline and Stefan organize stays and excursions to hunt truffels with Stefan. All information on their website Le Marche Experience.

The Dutch home owners Jacqueline and Stefan are very accommodating. ‘Use whatever you want and open every cupboard and drawer to find what you need.’ That turns out a quest not easy to succeed. They ask joining them to eat a pizza with two Italian couples, who are astonished their Dutch friends invite strangers into their place as they could steal everything. ‘Let them take whatever they want’, says Jacqueline while I chime in: ‘there is nothing that I want and not already have’. Jacqueline and I have an understanding, like everyone else who is on trustedhousesitters. (Besides, what feelings would come forth from that what one would steal?)

Stefan cooks us a delicious meal and while we eat explains how he found the house by chance when he was on a hunt. A truffle hunt, that is. As a certified truffle hunter he has Scooby to help him find the underground fungus. I wonder how Stefan would react when we, under different circumstances, would meet in the forest, he hunting truffles and I stealthily camping while also dotting the earth with organic matter. Truffles, however, do not grow out of animal faeces but from underground traces, this way truffles are year round to be found, says Stefan.

What is more remarkable is their integration into the area of rural Marche. Both speaking the language and clearly connecting with a pleasant kind of people they live among, it is obvious integration can only happen when in a fitting place. Hunters among hunters works better than our partly self-sustainable situation among Red Bull drinking hunters in rural Hungary (or a German neighbor who organizes trophy hunts to Africa and practice on our cats).

The sounds the puppies produce are so odd and funny it surprises me. If I’d close my eyes I could be among a school of dolphins, a pack of raging bulls, a nest of exotic birds. It comes close to a mayhem to us. There’s not a moment rest, picking up poop and wiping pee puddles, this is such a full-time job we should get paid for it. Jack Russell female Kees and the male truffle hunter Scooby are one of a kind. Kees is affectionate (calm, adorable, normal) and Scooby playful (hyperactive, irritating to some but not to me. Does he remind me of myself?). His sounds bordering those of a child in need for candies. Cat Luca sneezes and miaows, Oom Bob trying to get some much needed attention and new comer Ko tries slipping in while he knows he is supposed to be the outside watch dog (Ko is like a real life teddy bear, soft, clumsy, not aware of his strength and size).

While I go for a walk, a much needed escape to get my bearings back: bad night sleeps and lack of outdoor solace, Scooby skids out of the gate (the most forbidden thing). In total stress I can’t oversee the situation: must I run behind Scooby, who is so much faster than I am? Must I get my rain jacket first? Or shall I better call Geo who runs faster? Or perhaps I get Scooby’s toy to trick him back in? (Scooby is the breadwinner of this home!) Meanwhile the gate is wide open, aghast at this grave mistake, I close it while Geo is unaware of what is happening. As soon as he does, Scooby returns as by magic by something Geo does. Then, still in a frenzy I realize no puppies escaped. Totally overheated and worked up I can start my walk.

What we realise is that when growing older, we not only become less flexible, we also have a stronger need to our own ways. Not one kitchen suits me and there is no logic to any of these places. Italian homes are illogical to my brain (are these cultural preferences?).

Being in tune means good night sleeps and a spot-on producing intestine. Any experience has a lot to do with your own mindset and position you are in at that very moment. Now, I try to pay attention to all the dogs as well, which takes most of my time. I was never a person who could pay comfortably attention to more than 1 person. Yet, we are managing our competing demands well and this is one of the flexible characteristics of our marriage.

Luca cares for the Maremmano dog behind the fence. This dog was abandoned for years on end, fed only once a week. Until Stefan and Jacqueline bought the place.

From a snow covered hill country Geo moves the van down to the main road while I walk. His tracks are the first in the snow and so he has some grip. A logic fact maybe yet I prefer to walk to keep my stress level below the rim of overspilling. Our stay has my tension rising high and it was only the fun that the many dogs gave that kept the balance in check. The discomforts, the cold, the kitchen so different than my own, the decoration and the lack of aloneness. By now, house-sitting starts to tug at the seams and pinch at the cuffs, as the fake down jacket I wear all day long.

Back to the Bracciano home: Chakra

Our next and last home is one of comfort for 2.5 weeks long. Inside it is warm enough without stuff filling empty spaces. A modern house with sturdy amenities in a gated community. We move from hunters to leaf blowers and that also mean it is a lot more bland. We are relieved to be back at Valerie and Jeff’s immaculate home to care for quiet Chakra who patrols her territory, leaving trenches by her running up and down the hedges. The third time we come back for her, it makes me realize just how much I miss an animal in our home (again, something not feasible with the neighbor we got).

Outside the gated community, which is quiet, it is built up with roads where cars speed on. Italy is often that to my brain: an unthoughtful lay-out where buildings are dotted everywhere. Less than an hour away but the desire to go to Rome is fully absent. What’s got me the most is Chakra who shows a delicate opening up and when in the end she hoards our shoes, I know we did an excellent job. When Valerie comes back she hands me presents again, the kind of things I would have chosen myself (thank you Valerie).

Something all our female hosts had in common was the love for Italy. Although we do miss integration and socializing, we figured we would not easily integrate in Italy while at the same time having the size of house and soil and natural surrounding we do have in Hungary. This combination might be very difficult to obtain: one inherently eliminates the possibility of the other.

One thing I learned is that I understand dog people a lot better: the bound that forms so easily with a dog is a wonderful experience. This connection is a magical and one that I miss a lot once we will be without it. As I see it now, caring for a dog gives a whole lot of purpose to life.

So, does Italy suit us? The answer is an overwhelming: ‘Yes!’ We both like the people a lot, the foreigners who emigrate to Italy are sophisticated. The overal energy is positive, yet the upper half of wintery Italy isn’t very different than Hungary. Another very important fact for us is the space and easiness, freedom and peace of mind that goes for us in Hungary.

Another viewing turns out a wonderfully built home, one that reminds me of the place I lived in Pakistan, situated in a national park. However, the wooden beams that carry the home were rotting away and building laws in Italy don’t attract us much.

The plan to go by ferry to Spain was cancelled due to several storm over the Mediterranean. Geo drives us home overnight and it feels remarkably good to be back. Not one house felt so good as our home, not one house I would want to swap with. Unless it could be done in a second by swift touch… than I’d choose Maryse & Eduard’s while the location would be Jacqueline & Stefan’s. The dog would be Chakra and Ko in Kees’ format and the cats Ted and Tina.

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